Solo Assessments - Overall Summary

I am going to discuss my solo assessments in one large post rather than have several medium sized ones.

When we came back from the February holiday and started working properly on solo material, I was very confident (proved by this post here).  In February, I began recording weekly video logs of my progression.  While this proved rather effective to start with, when my playing began to dwindle, I lost interest.  I didn't like seeing my playing get worse rather than better.

In terms of practicing, to start with, I did well.  1-2 hours a day, at least.  With my lessons, I concentrated on playing the improvisation and the structure of the jazz songs (apart from certain tricky sections in the other two pieces, there isn't much I had to go over with Steve, my teacher in Blue Rondo and Black and White rag as all I have to do is read the music and play what's written).  Steve was pleased with my progress.

Then when the exam grew nearer, I found that my playing had started to worsen, and my hands were regularly starting to hurt after playing for over half an hour.  Perhaps it was due to stress, or an extra work load from other things, but I started to get very worried.  If I had stopped practicing about two weeks before the exam, I would have passed at least.  The standard at which I was playing the pieces was worth at least a pass.  But as the exam date grew nearer, I started to worry and tell myself things.

"You're at the stage you should have been two weeks ago."
"This is pointless, you'll never be able to play this part"
"Why can't I play this any more?"

In the two weeks before the exam, I overloaded myself, and that's where the problem lay.  I made the solo exam my number one priority, ignoring my social life completely, even missing certain college classes to practice.  I began practicing five hours a day.  And every day, my playing got worse.  Five hours turned to eight hours.  By the final few days leading up to it, I was playing about 10 hours a day.  Which sounds like a good thing, but I was practicing in the complete wrong way.  I wasn't stopping my playing when I played something wrong, I kept going and then repeated it over and over.   I was practicing the wrong thing.  Which got me into wrong habits.

This is, I believe, the most valuable thing I've learned from the solo exam disaster; how to practice effectively.  I've read books on the subject, and have learned that when practicing, the best thing to do is to stop playing a piece and focus on a part you can't play until you can play it right 5/5 times, not 3/5 times.  By the final couple of nights, I couldn't sleep due to stress and stayed up all night practicing with headphones in.

Then I started changing what I was playing.  Simplifying them.  So when I went to perform, I was playing things i'd been practicing for two days rather than two months.  Which is where the problem was.

The solo exam was a nightmare faced by many musicians; you're on the spot, and you suddenly can't play anything.  I am just lucky there wasn't an audience there.  It was a disaster.

Obviously, I didn't pass.  My saving grace is that I've been given a second chance, in 2 weeks.  I didn't play any of the pieces for the entire easter holidays, then came back to them after a long break and what a difference.  All I needed was a break from playing them, as opposed to cram-practicing.

I'm practicing slowly and steadily now, but have began to feel stressed again.  I am not going to ruin my performance (and chances of getting into the next year of the course) by stressing.  I am going to remain calm and practice efficiently over the next week and a half.   Though in that week and a half, I have so many deadlines to meet for other assignments.  I just need to work without over-working myself.

I will update with another post after the exam.  Which will hopefully be happier and contain more positive, constructive feedback.